when the weather is like this it always feels like the earth is dying. All i have done today is sit in bed in layers of jumpers and drink nettle tea and read read read don’t stop just read. I read Strangeland by Tracey Emin and it has made my stomach feel like a swollen pink cloud. I mean this in a good way but I also think it upset me a little, because afterwards I went for a walk in the woods and I had to stop myself from crying. The trees just felt so heavy around me and I felt utterly alone. But when i looked up above I realised that I did not feel sad nor happy. I simply felt alive for the first time in weeks; as though the wind shook me out of a sleepy daze.